Bob Mueller

Author

Wedding Officiant

Motivational Speaker

Memorial Service Officiant

United Catholic Church Bishop

 

18 Steps to Peace

How can you find peace in the valleys of your life?  Here are 18 excellent steps everyone can take to discover that way of life.

  1. Begin with the fact that worry is a habit.  Just like any other habit, it can be faced, dealt with and overcome.  Often we do not worry about specific trouble; rather we worry because we have acquired a bad habit.
  2. When you are upset, put skid chains on your tongue.  Most of us have a tendency to talk too much when we are disturbed.  We need to think more and say less, rather than say more and think less.
  3. Practice the art of a cheerful countenance.  Sometimes it is better to smile than it is to cry.  To hide your pains and worries and disappointments under a smile can oftentimes lead to a cheerful heart.
  4. Go ahead and cry.  This is not contradictory to the idea of being cheerful.  There are times when we need to cry, and sometimes our tears will bathe our souls.  There are time to hide our emotions and times to express our emotions.  We need to be able to know the difference.
  5. Believe that inner turmoil and tension and frustrations can really harm your life.  Inner disturbances can disintegrate one’s soul.  It is not good to be upset inside.  Peace is a lot healthier than war.
  6. When you are disturbed and bothered, analyze your problems.  It has been said that 40 percent of the things that disturb us are in the past; 50 percent of the things we worry about are in the future; only 10 percent of the things we worry about are problems we can deal with today.  Separate your upsetting thoughts and deal with that 10 percent you can deal with now.
  7. When you are disturbed and churning inside, make promises very sparingly.  Sometimes under strain and stress we promise a lot more than we need to or ought to.  Most promises should be made in a spirit of calmness and peace.   
  8. When we are upset, we are tempted to talk about the vices of other people.  But this is a time to say nothing, unless we can say something good.  Time and again people have made comments they wish they had never made.  There are times when saying nothing is the very best course.
  9. The wisest psychologist America has ever produced was William James.  He once said, “The essence of genius is to know what to overlook.”  There are some things that are just not worth bothering about.
  10. Stop worrying about whether or not you have been duly rewarded.  Do your work, be patient, keep a cheerful disposition, and you can be certain that eventually you will receive the respect due you.  Don’t worry about it; you will be recognized.  Believing that, you are under less strain.
  11. One of the greatest words to learn is imperturbability.  That means that no matter what happens, you are going to be calm and peaceful.  You are not going to let outside events destroy you inside.
  12. Remember that today is not the last day that you are going to live.  There is also a tomorrow, and you do not have to get everything done and everything settled today.  Affirm your faith in the future.
  13. At night when you come in from a day’s work, before you sit down to dinner, you go and wash your hands.  It is also a marvelous experience to practice washing out of our minds the unhappy thoughts and experiences of that day.  It is marvelous to empty your minds of any insecurity you may feel.
  14. Every so often, you need to stop by a gas station and fill up the gas tank of your car.  Otherwise your car will stop running.  So it is with the human mind.  We need to practice filling our minds with those positive thoughts that lead to courage and calmness and joy.
  15. Do not waste your worries.  On the other hand let your worries become the stimulus for positive action.  One of the main purposes of worry is to make us get up and get going in some positive way.
  16. Change your concerns from being self-centered and make them other-centered.  When we become outreaching in our attitudes and in our actions, marvelous blessings return to us.
  17. Develop the art of praise, instead of criticism.  Oftentimes when we correct somebody, we try to make ourselves believe that we are interested in helping that person.  But most of the people who pick out flaws in other people are expressing their own insecurity.  Start praising other people, and you will find your own inner problems diminishing.

Let every inner disturbance be a call to exercise your own faith.  One of the most beautiful of all carols says it all:

“O little town of Bethlehem
How still we see thee lie!
Above thy deep and dreamless sleep
The silent stars go by.”

When you take all of your troubles and face up to them in the most practical and reasonable way, you truly can find peace.